Brodie Lynn

Brodie —
8 years ago (well on December 2ND) you came into my life. I was so young. Very young. But I knew I wanted you. It may have not been the best of decisions that your Dad and I purposely try to get pregnant, but 8 years later, I wouldn’t change that choice. You have made my life better. Different, but better.
There were moments throughout my pregnancy with you that I sung to you, talked to you and dreamed of the moment I got to touch your precious little self. When the time finally came for me to do so, I was overwhelmed with all the feelings I felt for someone I just met. Your bright blue eyes stared at me and I fell in love. I wanted to be the best Mommy there ever was to you. And I know in your short life I have failed you. If someone were to ever ask me if I have ever experienced real heartbreak, I can answer honestly yes. That heartbreak comes from the fact that I probably could have done better as a Mom by you.
You were my learning experience. And together me and you grew. And together we still grow. Forever I will learn the ins and outs of raising a Daughter like you. A strong, independent, strong willed, dramatic, kind hearted, smart, giving person like you. You never cease to amaze me. I can promise you that. The way you used to beg to watch Winnie The Pooh. The way your eyes still light up at the sight of your Daddy. Crossing your arms and telling Grandma Sandy, “I’m sewious”. How at such a young age you loved Grandma Sandy’s dogs. Putting the trashcan on your head and running into the walls. The way you said I love you the first time. The first time you called me Mommy. Your first day of school. The first time you took a step, lost a tooth, we cut your hair. Oh your beautiful hair. Your beautiful shining blue eyes. Your freckles that dot your face. The scar that still is on your cheek from the day you were born. It’s slowly fading and it makes my heart yearn for that moment when you were a baby again. You carried your blanket everywhere since the moment I walked out of the hospital with you. You called it your “b”. You called hot dogs, dot dots. We used to walk stairs just so I could count with you. You made shapes out of playdoh and could tell us each shape when you were only 3. The way you used to sing “You Are My Sunshine”. That is the song I sang to you when you were inside me. The only place you could sleep was right between me and Daddy. No matter what.
I NEVER want to forget all those (and more) unforgettable, priceless moments. 8 years baby girl. 8 years me and you have been Mommy and Daughter. 8 years I wouldn’t change. Maybe a few things but I digress. I push you, because I want you to have the world. I punish you because I want you to always know to do right in this world. I struggle with you because as I said we are still growing together. I hold you because I know sometimes you don’t want to show your fear. I kiss you because you need to remember how precious love is. I talk to you so you won’t EVER be afraid to talk to me and because one day when you are grown you will be my best friend. I smile at you so you always know just how beautiful you are. I give you support so you always know just how smart you are.
Brodie these past 8 years have flown by like a flower in the wind. I saw a baby the other night and longed for you to have those little fingers once again. But I know that you won’t ever be that little again. As a Mom that’s something that is very hard to digest. So when I hold you too tight, push you to hard, punish you to harshly, smile at you to long or kiss you to much, it’s only because you will always be my baby girl. And one day you won’t want that kiss in public, that hug out the door before you head to school etc.
Through this all. This life of yours. This growing together of ours. I want you to know one thing. One simple little thing.
I love you. Because you are a part of me. Because you bring me joy, laughter, tears and all kinds of other wonderfully amazing and crazy things. I love you because of all those things I stated above.

But most of all….

I love you because you are you.

Happy 8Th Birthday Baby Girl! May you have the world!

The Day I Brought Her Home 8 Years Ago


And Now…..

Comments

  1. Dickey Family says:

    How sweet! Happy birthday Brodie! Britt you are such a great writer!

  2. The Francis 4 says:

    Very sweet! Your an amazing mommy! Brought tears to my eyes rading all about miss bordies birth! 🙂